Timon and Pumbaa's Christmas/Transcript

RAFIKI: And this is the Kupatana Celebration, when everyone in the Pride Lands gathers in peace to watch the baobab flowers bloom.

Oh! It's so pretty, Rafiki!

(CHUCKLES) Yes, Makini. And as Royal Mjuzi, you will need to know all of the Pride Lands' celebrations.

Oh, good! 'Cause I want to learn all the Pride Lands celebrations! What's this one, Rafiki? Is that Timon?

Ah, yes, it is.

Timon is placing a star fruit at the top of his Christmas tree.

Christmas tree? But it looks like an acacia tree.

(CHUCKLES) Of course! You are new to the Pride Lands.

You have not yet celebrated Christmas with us.

Christmas? What's Christmas?

It is the most wonderful celebration of all.

Would you like to hear the story of how Timon and Pumbaa introduced Christmas to the Pride Lands?

Oh, yes! Please, please, please!

Very well. It begins with the appearance of a special star high in the sky.

 On the day before Christmas,  a star shines so bright.

 All over the Pride Lands,  it is seen day and night.

 ¶ Jungle smells,  jungle smells,  jungle all the way '' ¶ Oh, what fun it is to... ¶''

PUMBAA: Uh, Timon? That's not the way I remember the song.

Come on, Pumbaa. How can you not remember? We sing it every Christmas.

I-I know, but...

There! Pumbaa? Bunga? Whaddaya think, eh?

Let's see.

Oh, it's beautiful, Timon.

Yeah, Uncle Timon, it's perfect.

Almost perfect.

We still need the star fruit for the top of the tree.

One star fruit, coming up.

Here you go.

Thanks, Bunga.

Now for the "piece de resistance!"

There. All done.

(YELLING)

Oh, Timon!

I gotcha! Zuka Zama!

Whoops.

(GROANS)

Thanks, Beshte.

We heard you shouting. Good thing we were close by.

Why were you in that tree, anyway?

And why are there gourds hanging all over it?

Because it's a Christmas tree. See that big star up there?

That means tomorrow is Christmas.

 Poa!

Uh, what's Christmas?

BOTH: "What's Christmas"?

It's this great holiday my uncles made up.

Ho, ho, no! We did not make it up!

Timon's right.

We heard about it from an ox,

who heard it from a yellow wagtail,

who heard it from a flying reindeer!

Flying reindeer? Reindeer don't...

The point is,

Christmas is a wonderful day when we all get presents!

It's more like a time to be with your friends and family.

It's all about the spirit of giving!

You mean "getting."

I'm pretty sure it's "giving."

Actually, you can't have getting without giving.

Or giving without getting.

But you know what the best part of Christmas is?

Dandy Claws!

Dandy Claws? Is that a who or a what?

Oh! He's a big red guy with fluffy white whiskers.

And on Christmas morning, he leaves lots of presents under the Christmas tree!

Yeah, Christmas is the best!

 ¶ It's sunny in the Serengeti

 ¶ And there's no sign of snow

 ¶ But when that big star  shines above

 ¶ There's one thing I know

 ¶ It's Christmas  in the Pride Lands

 ¶ My favorite day

 ¶ It's filled with peace  and friendship

 ¶ And presents and play

 ¶ With everyone together  the Hakuna Matata way

 ¶ It's Christmas

 ¶ Oh, it's Christmas

 ¶ In the Pride Lands

 ¶ Gather holly and ivy  and mistletoe, too

 ¶ We're not sure why

 ¶ It's just what you do

 ¶ It's a day to share  with family and friends

 ¶ Lots of gift-giving

 ¶ Getting  ¶ Giving

 ¶ Getting, getting  ¶ Giving

 ¶ And the fun never ends

 ¶ It's Christmas  in the Pride Lands

 ¶ My favorite day

 ¶ It's filled with  peace and friendship

 ¶ And presents and play

 ¶ With everyone together  the Hakuna Matata way

 ¶ It's Christmas  ¶ It's Christmas

 ¶ Oh, it's Christmas

 ¶ In the Pride Lands

 ¶ On Christmas morning,  I hope there's peace

 ¶ For everyone under the sky

 ¶ But more than that,  I hope there's presents

 ¶ Left for me  by that big red guy

ALL:  ¶ It's Christmas  in the Pride Lands

 ¶ My favorite day

 ¶ It's filled with peace  and friendship

 ¶ And presents and play

 ¶ With everyone together  the Hakuna Matata way

 ¶ It's Christmas  ¶ It's Christmas

 ¶ Oh, it's Christmas

 ¶ In the Pride Lands  ¶ In the Pride Lands

 ¶ In the Pride Lands  ¶ In the Pride Lands

 ¶ Oh, it's Christmas

 ¶ It's Christmas  ¶ Oh, it's Christmas

 ¶ In the Pride Lands ¶

So this Dandy Claws brings you gifts every year?

Yes. That is, well...

No.

Dandy Claws has never come. And I'm afraid he never will.

(CRYING)

Why not?

Well, from what we've heard, Dandy Claws only comes

if you perform a special song under the Christmas tree on Christmas morning.

It's called The Twelve Ways of Christmas.

It's got leaping lions, bouncing berries,

falling fruit, all sorts of stuff.

Yeah, but you can't just sing about 'em!

They gotta be there! It's a huge production!

Animals, fruit, bugs.

It's too much.

I've tried, but I've never been able to do it.

It's impossible!

And that's why Dandy Claws will never come and bring me gifts!

Oh, cheer up, Timon.

Bunga and I give you gifts every Christmas.

Yeah!

I know, and they're always great.

But just once, I'd like Dandy Claws to bring me something, too.

Well, who knows? Maybe someday he will.

(SIGHS) Maybe.

Okay. Well, time for one more patrol before Christmas.

Bunga, you coming?

Okay.

See ya, Uncle Pumbaa. Bye, Uncle Timon.

So long, Bunga.

Yeah, see ya.

(SIGHS)

You okay, Little B?

Yeah, I just wish I could make Dandy Claws appear

and have Uncle Timon's Christmas dream come true.

Well, maybe we can.

But we'd have to do that song.

 The Twelve Ways  of Christmas?

Timon said it's impossible.

And tomorrow's Christmas! We'd have to get everything ready today!

So? We're the Lion Guard.

We do the impossible all the time.

Ooh, yeah, we do, don't we?

Okay, Little B, I'm in.

Me, too.

Affirmative.

Yes! Thanks, everybody.

Okay. Bunga, what do we need for The Twelve Ways  of Christmas?

Oh, so much!

Bugs a-crawling, fruit a-falling,

lions leaping, trunks a-honking...

Whoa, whoa, whoa! I never thought I'd say this,

but slow down!

Maybe you should start from the beginning.

Okay, so the song goes like this.

 ¶ For the First Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ In a baobab tree ¶

And that's it. What do you think?

Sounds like a big job, but if we split up, I think we can do it.

We'll divide up the things and animals we have to gather,

and meet back at Hakuna Matata Falls.

Sure! This is gonna be the most un-Bunga-lievable Christmas ever!

Ooh, but don't let Timon and Pumbaa see you!

I really want it to be a surprise!

Dandy Claws? I don't like the sound of that.

I think it sounds like fun.

Can we, Ma Tembo? Please?

What was it you said we'd be doing?

Um, a-honking?

Hear that? It's a performance!

Hmm. I do love to perform.

And Beshte's like family.

We elephants would be delighted to be in your Christmas performance.

Yay! (TRUMPETS)

 Poa! It'll be great!

SIMBA: You want me to do what?

Oh, come on, Dad, please?

It's for Timon and Pumbaa.

Just think of all they've done for you over the years, Simba.

And besides, you might enjoy yourself.

Mom's right, Dad. I think you'll have fun.

Fine, I'll be in your song.

Thanks, Dad.

But if I'm going to do it, so are you.

Both of you.

Actually, we need all of you. And Tiifu and Zuri, too.

Great! We can all leap together!

Kion, you can count on us.

Thanks, everybody. Now I gotta go.

You won't believe all the things we need for this song!

And Merry Christmas!

Uh, Merry Christmas?

Merry Christmas, Kion.

Yes, whatever that means.

Ooh!

'' ¶ Nine bugs a-crawling! ¶''

Big, fat, juicy, delicious-looking bugs.

Bunga? You're saving those for the song, right?

(SIGHS) Yeah.

PUMBAA:  ¶ For the First Way  of Christmas...

(GASPS) That sounds like Pumbaa!

 Hapana!

It is Pumbaa.

Gotta hide the bugs. Gotta hide the bugs.

(GASPS)

Oh, hi, fellas.

Hi, Uncle Pumbaa.

Whatcha up to?

Nothing. Just hangin' out.

Not looking for anything squirmy, what you doing?

Oh, who, me? Uh, nothing.

I'm definitely not lookin' for a special Christmas surprise for Timon, I'll tell ya that.

Yeah, us neither.

Well, me and Ono got, uh, Lion Guard stuff to do.

Talk to ya later.

Okay. See ya, Bunga.

Ooh. White flowers. Perfect.

(GULPS)

Hey! I thought we were saving 'em for the song!

You put them in my mouth!

But I didn't say you could swallow 'em.

(SIGHS) Guess we gotta start all over.

(GRUNTS)

How did I get stuck with gathering berries?

(GRUNTS)

VOICE: Hey, down there, young cheetah!

Huh? Who's up there?

It's me! Uroho!

And the amazing Mwizi and Mwevi!

You might know us as The Traveling Baboon Show!

Oh, yeah. I remember you.

Looks like you could use some help reaching those berries!

(SIGHS) Yeah, I guess I could.

Come on, fellas. Help the cheetah out.

I never thought I'd say this, but thank you, baboons.

So, what do you need the berries for?

They're for, uh, a performance.

Kinda silly, but it's for a friend.

You know, we need some baboons, too.

Something else I never thought I'd say.

A performance, huh? We are intrigued.

Tell us more, please.

Okay, well, have you ever heard of Christmas?

Hmm. That is one strange-looking acacia tree.

It's pretty, though.

It must be the Christmas Tree Kion told us about.

Hey, you made it.

Are we the first ones here?

Uh, not exactly. Come on!

Oh, my. This is a big production.

Okay, everybody, you gotta pay attention,

'cause we've only got till sunrise to get this right.

I already know what to do.

(TRUMPETS)

Shh! Not so loud! You'll wake up Uncle Timon and Uncle Pumbaa!

Sorry.

Hakuna Matata. Just save it for the performance.

SIMBA: What about us? What do we do?

One at a time, okay?

Oh. Hi, Your Highnesses.

Didn't see you there.

Don't let us interrupt you, Bunga. You were saying?

Uh, yeah.

So, we need to do the song perfectly if we want Dandy Claws to show up!

But no pressure.

Right, right. No pressure.

Don't worry, Little B. It's gonna be great.

Wait. Who's Dandy Claws again?

The rest of you remember Dandy Claws, right?

ALL: No!

This is going to be a long night.

BUNGA: Okay, from the beginning.

ANIMALS:  ¶ And a rhino  in a baobab tree ¶

That was great. Thanks, everyone.

Yeah, well, we're getting closer.

Okay, from the beginning.

(ALL GROAN)

Bunga, we've been practicing all night long.

I know, but it needs to be perfect.

Bunga, we're out of time. The sun's about to come up.

If we haven't learned it by now,

I don't know if we ever will.

Oh, well, we gave it a try.

Maybe next year.

I never really got the whole Christmas thing anyway.

Oh.

Sorry, Little B.

No. Wait. Everybody, stop!

We can't just give up like this.

Please?

Kion, Bunga, what's so important about this... "Christmas"?

Well, Pumbaa says Christmas is all about the spirit of giving.

And him and Uncle Timon are the only family I have.

They took me in when I was little, and all alone.

They took you in, too.

Yes, they did.

They've given me everything.

So this Christmas, I wanna give them a performance they won't forget.

Okay, Bunga. Then that is exactly what we are going to do.

Right, everyone?

Of course, Your Majesty.

The show must go on.

Great! The sun's rising and time's a-wasting!

Let's go!

(SNORING)

Grubs, grubs...

Uncle Timon, Uncle Pumbaa!

Wake up, it's Christmas!

What, what, huh?

Whoa, Christmas already? Hear that, Timon?

(YAWNS) You know what? I'm gonna give Christmas a pass this year.

BOTH: Huh? You're what?

Who needs the disappointment?

I'm gonna sleep in.

No, you're not! It's Christmas!

A special day we look forward to all year long!

And who knows? This just might be the best one ever!

Yeah, I don't know about that. But okay.

Great. Come on!

(TIMON YELLS)

So, what's going on here?

Watch.

This is the year we're finally going to get a visit from Dandy Claws!

Ready?

 ¶ For the First Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ A rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Second Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Two snapping crocs  and a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Third Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Fourth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Fifth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Sixth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Seventh Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Eighth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Eight trunks a-honking

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Ninth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Nine bugs a-crawling

 ¶ Eight trunks a-honking

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Tenth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Ten baboons burping

 ¶ Nine bugs a-crawling

 ¶ Eight trunks a-honking

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Eleventh Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Eleven egrets squawking

 ¶ Ten baboons burping

 ¶ Nine bugs a-crawling

 ¶ Eight trunks a-honking

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ For the Twelfth Way  of Christmas,  my good friends gave to me

 ¶ Twelve berries bouncing

 ¶ Eleven egrets squawking

 ¶ Ten baboons burping

 ¶ Nine bugs a-crawling

 ¶ Eight trunks a-honking

 ¶ Seven hippos hopping

 ¶ Six lions leaping

 ¶ Panic and run

 ¶ Four falling fruits

 ¶ Three porcupines

 ¶ Two snapping crocs

 ¶ And a rhino in a baobab tree

 ¶ And a rhino  in a baobab tree ¶

ALL: Merry Christmas, Timon and Pumbaa!

(WAILING)

Did we do it wrong?

No. It was perfect!

These are tears of joy!

That was The Twelve Ways  of Christmas the way I always dreamed it could be.

Thank you. Thank you, all of you.

(TIMON WEEPING)

What's wrong, Bunga?

I just thought, after such a great performance,

Dandy Claws would come.

Well... (BELLS RINGING)

Who's that?

Ho, ho, ho!

It's me!

ALL: Dandy Claws?

Pumbaa! You're Dandy Claws?

Well, you always wanted Dandy Claws to show up on Christmas,

so I decided, this year, he would. The thing is,

it took so long to put this costume together,

I don't have any gifts to give you. Sorry, Timon.

Pumbaa. Come on.

You made Dandy Claws appear on Christmas day!

But you said Christmas was all about gifts.

And we got gifts. Look!

Berries, bugs, fruit!

But we also got lots of friends.

And family. All right here.

And they're the best gifts anybody could ask for.

Oh, you're right, Timon.

And you know what this sounds like to me?

BOTH: It's the best Christmas ever!

Wow. Thanks, guys!

Sure, Bunga.

You know, I think we should celebrate Christmas every year.

Me, too.

Affirmative.

ALL: Merry Christmas!

RAFIKI: And that is how Timon and Pumbaa introduced the Pride Lands to the special day known as Christmas. It celebrates the gift of family, friends, and the joy of being together.

You know what I think, Rafiki? I think Christmas celebrates the gift of the circle of life.

(CHUCKLES) Yes, young Mjuzi. I could not have said it better myself.